By: Destiny Rose
Its to hard to get up again – too hard to start fresh. I know I must do it as there is no way out. I don’t have the energy or want to go on. I don’t want to forge my way through life and gather what I had. I lay thinking on how can I – why do I want to strive? I have done it already – reached my peak and succeeded. I don’t want to be a broken someone that’s striving but meek. I think of the task; all that needs to be done and I can find a start from the hundreds, a start that’s just one. I lay here for hours and fret before sleep. I lay sweating profusely for the clarity I seek. It doesn’t come at all… I’m left with no end. How I can put this life back together, start it on the mend?
Each day I try to muster the strength to succeed to take me back to a time when I don’t have the struggling to find the coin for a feed. I know it will get better, I have been told that it’s so, I just can’t see it yet right now as my life has no glow. Oh how I wish things were different easier less stressed I do wish it were easier to get up and get dressed. But for now it’s a big mess that I’m left to endure. A mess that my life left me in. A mess that’s for sure…..
No one can help me or direct me to be free. Nor can they understand the pain that’s in me. There’s no one there when I look there’s no one to ask, I stand here alone to help it seems not with this burden, this task. They all say that they are my friend but where are they now? They say they will be there to help but it seems not help with the mend. So I stand here alone the task grows by the day it grows big like a mountain, you can see for away. It grow with every thought, every action each day. It grows far too big for me – making my days turn to grey.
I wish I could shed all the stuff from my life. I wish I could clear it out – for now it’s the cause of my strife. It must be depression.
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